Monday, August 17, 2009

Medievalisms Mid-August we be. Mid-August, everyone gearing up for new academic year; some have even already started.

My medievalisms of the week are cheats in a way. But here goes anyway.

My favorite spouse is out of town visiting family, which means I have sole control of the remote control!!!!!!! WOOT!!!!!! Can you say party??!!!! OK, I've slowly weaned favorite spouse off of home improvement shows and other crazy buttock related fecal material. On the other hand, she has made me watch, and LIKE, more reality show television than I ever thought possible. Top Chef anyone? Hooked!

Anyway, I babble. T'is the wine bottle's fault. So....being in control of the remote for the last four days in the middle of August means I've caught up on my USA network shows (In Plain Sight, Burn Notice, and Royal Pains) with new seasons just beginning (Psych). And I've been current on Eureka (yay!) and Warehouse 13 (how ironic that the actor who plays Arnie played a "collector" on ST:TNG, but I digress). It also means I have caught up on every TV show we watch or I watch in the "Free TV" show category on ON DEMAND as well as all the free movies I want to watch. I even resorted to paying $5 for an On Demand movie, and it wasn't even medieval related....I am certain you are shocked.

Well, after all this nonsense, I'm sure you're waiting, oh, so excitedly, for what this has to do with medieval shtuff and medievalism. Well, wait no longer!

I in utter and complete desperation, went to SyFy having viewed Cold Case and Mystery Theater and Iron Chef America on previous occasions. And I finished my book! SO that left me as the most acceptable alternative to fit in before walking the dogs, Blood Rayne, a 2006 flick based on the earlier video game. Ok, Vampires are not my thing, nor do I want to dwell on the liberated women of faux medieval tripe offered up by the game, nor the 19th century carnival in the beginning mixed in with the "medievalesque" context. No, I want to focus on a particular aspect, the character in the movie named Sebastian. Yes, Sebastian.

I don't have first hand experience with the game. Just with the overall very bad movie I just saw (and it isn't bad because of its treatment of medieval and's bad because it's horribly written, abysmally acted, and poorly conceived...but what fun!). That said, I find it fascinating that the somewhat young Sebastian is an expert ARCHER...those familiar with medieval iconography will recall that the unfortunate St. Sebastian is often depicted against a pillar or post and his body filled with I dare attribute to the writers/director/producer some sort of medieval or medievalism joke in making their Sebastian an archer and a lover of a "heretic" mudblood (vampire and human)? HMMM, such the credit them with knowledge of an inside joke, or just happy serendipity that provided me entertainment...that is the question.

On a completely unrelated note, I point you to Aug. 16 Bizzaro and another jab at the poor, hapless medieval monk: Reminds me of sending fox in Mel Brook's and Cary Elwes' Robin Hood: Men in Tights (Rabbi Tuck always gets a laugh!)...but I digress....and so for now, I bid thee farewell. Enjoy!

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